I'm wondering how I suddenly ended up in this perpetual state of crazy. I'm aware of when it began, though, I'm not sure at what point I decided to let it take over. Basically, I have a tendency to allow myself to feel "oh woe is me" about decisions I made quite some time ago. One of my favorite humans once told me "Jaime, you only seem to want what you can't have". I argued at the time that she was incorrect and also, crazy. It seems as though she wasn't wrong and is definitely not crazy. I want what I can't have every second of every day and it's fucking killing me. I think about these things more than anything else.
Oh woe is me.
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